SquarePeg Books

I cannot promise how, where or when these words were used, if ever. I simply find them delightful, and want to share.

WANKPUFFIN

Supposed to be a word from a British dialect, a Wankpuffin is a word used to describe a self-absorbed jerk.

I’ve heard “wanker,” and “wank-stain,” but “wankpuffin” is definitely a first.

Every time I look at this word, it takes a minute to erase the image of a seabird, making a predatory dive beneath the waves, viciously hunting male aquatic species by attacking their genitalia.

It’s a bizarre image.

The next image that pops up after the seabird is somebody smoking a big fat stanky stogie while being irritating, possibly in a “mansplaining” way.

Which is closer to the definition than the bird, but still oddly specific.

Because of all the customer service I do, for very self-absorbed folks (a hazard for my particular place of employ), I’ve come to realize I prefer the seabird imagery.

It makes me less angry.