SquarePeg Books

According to my dictionary:

Productive: adjective (1612)

1: having the quality or power of producing especially in abundance

2: effective in bringing about

3a: yielding or furnishing results b: yielding or devoted to the satisfaction of wants or the creation of utilities

4: continuing to be used in the formation of new words or constructions

5: raising mucus or sputum

Motivation: (1873)

1: the act or process of motivating

Motive: (15c)

1:  a need or desire that causes a person to act

2:  a recurrent phrase or figure that is developed  through the course of a musical composition

Syn: Motive, Impulse, Incentive, Inducement, Spur, Goad – mean a stimulus to action

Success: (1537)

1 obs: Result

2a: a degree of measure of succeeding b: favorable or desired outcome; also: the attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence

3: one that succeeds

Discipline: (13c)

1: Punishment

2 obs: Instruction

3: a subject that is taught: a field of study

4: training that corrects, molds, or perfects mental faculties or moral character

5a: control gained by enforcing obedience or order b: orderly or prescribed conduct of behavior c: self control

6: a rule or system of rules governing conduct or activity

I do not appear to be doing any of those well, lately. Well, except for number 5 under the “productive” category – I’ve been mildly sick for the past week.

I’ve recently managed to get sort-of back on track with the writing aspect of things. The project itself is daunting (shut up – writing about war isn’t easy).

Facebook is…daunting. I do not feel the need or desire to share most anything like everyone seems to. I have the book and I’m slowly slogging through it, but progress is… less than expected.

Getting up at 0530 to exercise and maybe get a few little things done in the mental sphere before I have to deal with the kids is difficult, to put it mildly. Not because I’m tired, but because my desire to deny reality just a little longer every morning seems to be stronger than my desire to accomplish things in a more orderly and successful fashion.

I make a lot of excuses, and I realize the excuses are being made, but I can’t seem to dig down beneath them to find the real cause for why I seem to be holding myself back.

Suggestions, anyone?